no talent

I have come to realize I have many hobbies but I am not good at any of them. that is probably the reason I don’t even bother anymore. I love drawing,painting,photography, the problem is I can’t draw worth anything painting is mediocre and photography is just hard I don’t seem to ever take good pictures, my camera is decent not the best but decent. I do have photo shop but im not good at figuring it out I try playing with it but nothing ;( I guess I bring this up because it frustrates me I don’t have talent in anything. I don’t bother writing poems anymore because my grammar and spelling is awful and besides I have no inspiration anymore. art is something that is just difficult I cant even draw a 3 d box that was basics in art class. and painting is a joke I look at the ceramics I have painted nothing special, and as far as painting on paper since I cant draw I have nothing to paint. I could try abstract but even that looks dumb.  it sucks because my husband has so much talent his writing is perfect,photography is perfect and he is an amazing artist every gift I wish I had he has it’s really really sad I don’t think he realizes just how talented he really is.


So I have my first cardiologist appointment this thursday, good thing because the chest pain is still daily I’m so tired of it. Ronnie thinks I have anxiety, I thought about it but it does not seem like it. I have 1 symptom out of a whole list so I doubt it, but I guess I just want a dx so at least I can fix the problem instead of everyone having their own opinion of what’s wrong with me. On other news I am so irritated ,I’m tired, and I just want a vacation. I feel like I work hard in every aspect of my life and it is not appreciated or noticed. Of course being a christian the only one who matters is God and that he sees your hard work. I guess just like anyone else I just want a compliment here and there.Oh well I didn’t really feel like writing but I havent in so long I decided to write something…have a great day:)